The organized mess
The Family Ties Parents Panel is taking a short holiday break. This month, enjoy a few previously published posts. Originally posted Feb. 16, 2009, by JoAnn Polickoski.
I’m a very organized person. Or at least I used to be, before kids. You’d never know it now by coming to my house. Actually, I probably wouldn’t let you into my house if you did stop by.
Ten years ago, I could picture my home looking like those photos in a magazine, with everything stowed in the perfect matching, color-coded container. Closets organized by length of shirtsleeves. Outlines drawn on the pegboard, so anyone in the house could find and then put away the hammer. Correct labels on the Tupperware containers in the pantry. Coats lovingly hung by the back door and shoes neatly lined up below.
Now if a camera crew came inside my house, it would more likely be to take a “before” shot. And I wonder what the heck happened.
Well, life happened. Fourteen years of marriage, five kids, eight moves. Home schooling, sports and Scouts came into our lives, all requiring more stuff.
Baby gifts, Christmas gifts and birthday gifts start compounding exponentially with this many kids. Bins of outgrown clothes, sports gear, toys and books are waiting in the wings to be handed down when the next child comes of age. Meanwhile, we have all the current-age stuff stuffed in every available closet, cabinet and drawer.
Several bookcases are full of not just this year’s home schooling texts and workbooks but also past grades’ materials awaiting reuse. Home schooling also gives us the freedom to do projects at our leisure, but learning to think “out of the box” often means art supplies never make it back into a box for days on end and instead take up temporary residence on the kitchen counter.
Even though my job title has the word “home” in it, there’s rarely a day that we’re home all day. Leaving to drive my daughter to a 45-minute dance class in all reality has an almost three-hour impact on my day.
We usually are still doing schoolwork when we have to come to an abrupt halt, leaving the books and papers right where they were. Then the leaving-the-house routine starts: change two diapers, pour three cups of milk into juice cups, round up extra diapers and a change of clothes for the baby, get my 2-year-old’s blankies and bucket of “Cars” cars that don’t leave home without him, grab some snacks and juice boxes for the non-dancing children, gather whatever books they’re going to read in the car, make sure we have the correct selection of DVDs to entertain the 2-year-old and buckle four kids into car seats before we make the 15-minute drive.
When we finally get home, everything that went out to the van comes back into the house except now the baby’s crying and dinner needs making and everyone scatters to their rooms, leaving books, toys, the diaper bag and now the day’s mail in their wake.
When my mom visits, she doesn’t even try to hide her disgust at my housekeeping – “I thought I taught you better!” OK, Mom, but you had only two kids who were at school all day and didn’t really participate in any extra-curricular activities, and your cleaning-obsessed mother lived with you for 17 years. If you really want to help, help yourself to a broom or a dust cloth.
I’m desperately searching for solutions. I’ve checked out countless books from the library on home organization, clutter control, time management and home school scheduling, and while I’ve implemented some suggestions from each, none of them has hit the nail on the head because not one accounts for dealing with children’s personalities and organizational skills that often are at odds with my fleeting desire for that picture-perfect home.
Short of volunteering for a “life makeover” that I’ve seen in women’s magazines or calling in the “Clean Sweep” crew, I really need a book about managing a large, active, home schooling family with a wide span of ages. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!
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