Beach-goers’ attire leaves little to the imagination
Like many South Carolina families, the minute the kids were out of school this summer, we ventured to the mecca of summer vacation spots known as Myrtle Beach. There’s nowhere else the kids like to go better than the beach, so we try to make a trip there in the early summer of each year.
Although we were staying at one end of the beach, a wrong turn put us on Ocean Boulevard much earlier than we needed to be to find our hotel. Not quite knowing exactly where our hotel was, and with the GPS not able to get a signal, we rode a long while not knowing quite how much farther we had to go.
It was then that I began to wonder if womens’ bathing suits made out of virtually no material whatsoever, covering as small a space of the body’s private areas as possible, cost more or less than those that were modest. Sometime between the time my brain overcame the shock of what I was seeing walking down the sidewalk and the computations I was making regarding exactly how little material it must cost to make some of the outfits I was seeing, I began to hear the comments coming from my children. With four boys and two girls riding behind me, I knew I had to act fast.
I had to either make all of my children lie down in the Suburban so they could not see out of the window or use the experience as a learning time and a “non-example” of what was appropriate. I chose the non-example choice and each time I heard an exclamation of what some woman was wearing, I said, “I can’t believe women would dress like this and walk outside! How trashy!”
I have always purchased one-piece bathing suits for my girls and only recently have they begun to request two-piece suits. I won’t give in. I told them to feel free to dress however they wanted when they were not living in my home and were spending their own money on clothing. They have even shown me some “tankinis” that appear to be appropriate, but once they tried them on and I saw the potential for the “tank” part to ride up in the pool or while they were playing, I stood my ground.
How do we, as parents, help our children develop dressing standards when they are surrounded by so many “non-examples”?
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My girls (ages 10 and 13) are allowed to wear tankinis (makes going to the bathroom 100 times easier than wrestling a wet one-piece on and off) but they also must put a rashguard shirt over them while swimming, and wear board shorts over the bottom half whenever they are not physically in the water. That’s how we’ve always done it, and I’ve had no complaints.
I have absolutely no problem with parents keeping their minor children modest and teahcing them the value in doing so. I think it is extremely important. However, my problem is how you would say
“I can’t believe women would dress like this and walk outside! How trashy!” The reason their is issue with this, is: First, I will assume you are talking of an adult woman and not a minor child. With this assupmption made, I find it rather horrible that you would teach your children to judge someone as “trashy” by the bathing suit she chooses to wear, while at THE BEACH! I am very modest woman (I will not even wear skirts to work, because of men looking at me), and I always wear a bikini at the beach. I think you should be teaching your daughters/sons the value of being modest (attracting the wrong attention, etc.) while not judging others. Because as the old saying goes “You cannot judge a book by its cover.” And you should always teach your children that. BTW, do you think it “trachy” for a male to wear a Speedo??
Has anyone seen the new add for the razors. I may be young myself (I just turned 30), but I am appalled that the young couple is wearing little and are shown wrestling on bed in afternoon hours on major networks and sport channels. Anyone could be watching tv at those hours and I maybe a prude, but decency is nonexistent. The ad did not need that clip.
THIS IS CLEARLY A NEWSWORTHY ARTICLE, HAD I NEVER READ THIS I CLEARLY WOULD NEVER HAVE KNOWN THAT WOMEN WEAR SKIMPY SWIMSUITS AT THE BEACH. Thanks for such a waste of my time.
Tankinis are great for the reasons JoAnn mentioned. The tankini tops with board or swim shorts are my suit of choice. So comfortable – no constant pulling up or down to cover – and practical. Wish these were popular when I was a teen because I never like wearing a bikini even when I was young enough to do so. (BTW, I find it interesting that someone would take the time to read this entire post – completely miss the point – then take more time to comment and then blame you for wasting his/her time. Seems pretty good at doing that all by him/herself.)
Hello- Myrtle Beach itself is trashy. Go to Ocean Isle or something.
Supporting Photos would be helpful
I guess you’d prefer that your children learn that their bodies are something to be ashamed of, correct?
Trying to teach children to have respect for themselves and the image they present is not teaching them to be ashamed of their bodies. It’s teaching them that their bodies are special and should be treated as such (baring all to every passerby on the beach is not showing a whole lot of respect for yourself). Also, wearing more modest swimsuits or clothing on the beach is a matter of comfort (no constant tugging and pulling and worrying what might fall out) and health (sunburn and skin cancer).
Yawn. I heard these complaints before…in 1956.
Get over your prudishness. The human body is nothing to be ashamed of.
Teaching children that there are personal and family standards for what they wear and how they act is not being a prude; it’s being a parent. And both Wes and cab1 are correct, the human body is nothing to be ashamed of, but that doesn’t mean that I want my daughters flaunting their themselves for gawking 40- and 50-year-old men. No, they shouldn’t be ashamed of their bodies; they should be proud of them, and as such should treat them with respect and not be pressured into an anything-goes attitude because someone might call them a prude. Not standing by their principles is the only thing that should make them ashamed.
I logged onto this expecting a survey. Not someone else telling me what to think. Is the question about ladies swimwear in general, or the atmosphere at Myrtle Beach? In my mind that would be two completely different discussions.
Mary, you can find the survey in the right column with this post, with any post on the site, or on the site home page thestate.com/family.
My girls, while allowed what they wanted to, always preferred “tankinis” themselves and wearing board shorts after getting out of the water..and sometimes even in the water if having too much fun to take the time to take them off! But I do think REQUIRING them to wear tank suits until they move out is a wrong move, it isn’t letting them learn by experience… once wearing a teeny bikini, I found that both I (when I was younger of course) and my girls all decided that tankinis and tanks were the way to go after feeling under-dressed. They won’t know it until they “feel” it, and want to sit in a chair or with a beach towel wrapped as a sarong. Forcing your morals on your children won’t help them learn them. This isn’t something like “drink if you like”, or something else dangerous, sometimes its best to let kids learn on their own. BTW, I have four kids… two boys 31 and 25 and two girls 21 and 16… and they ALL grew up with modest beliefs and high morals…
Oh, and we DON’T go to Myrtle Beach, that’s like going to a strip club. There are MANY other beaches in SC/NC/GA that don’t have that type of atmosphere…
This article is useless without pictures. Its hard to imagine what you are talking about.
Personally, I think the tankini and “boy” shorts swim attire for women is much more sexier than the skimpy suits that cover almost nothing. More coverage leaves more to the imagination.
Jamie: No one is talking about pressuring girls to wear a 2 piece bathing suit. It is Stephanie’s right to tell her children what they can wear at the beach but her distain for women who wear clothing that she feels is inappropriate is ridiculous.
RG and SB: Thanks for your insight.
Good job Stephanie, As parents we are guide and direct the path our little blessings are on. As you well know, we have adopted 4 wonderful blessings. 3 with special needs. I believe it is my “job” to install in our children right from wrong and yes not looking “trashy” With my girls I want them to know now what is acceptable dress before they are making these decisions for themselves. As for the speedos.They were made for competitive swimming not bouncing around the beach.
Jun 23rd, 2010 at 5:38 pm
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